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Monday, January 31, 2005

Staying Au Courant With Office Slang

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Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.

Batmobiling - putting up emotional shields. Refers to the retracting armor that covers the Batmobile as in “she started talking marriage and he started batmobiling”

Blamestorming - A group discussion of why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

Egosurfing - Scanning the Net, databases, etc., for one’s own name

Irritainment - Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying, but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example.

Keyboard Plaque- The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on some people’s computer keyboards.

Perot - To quit unexpectedly. “My cellular phone just perot’ed.”

SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. “Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage”

Umfriend - One with whom one has a sexual relationship; as in, “this is Dale,”